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Denver TSA Behavior Detection Officers – Surprisingly Not Standing Around Picking Noses

As many of our loyal readers have probably guessed, I’m not a big fan of the Totally Stupid Administration, or TSA. In general, I think this entire agency smacks of the worst in government incompetence.

They’re always implementing new measures designed to protect us from the last attack – that was foiled by someone else. In my experience, the vast majority of them range from melancholy indifference – just there to pick up the paycheck and punch that timecard for a federal pension – to something falling between downright rudeness and mad drunken-with-fake-BS-powerness – these people are the ones who get a kick out of taking your toothpaste and then being belligerent and vaguely threatening when you point out to them that you are a 97 year-old grandmother in a walker travelling with a caseload of kittens to donate to the orphanage, which calls the entire logic behind their “search” into question.

Typically, they love to point out that they could escalate the situation somehow, though exactly what they can/will do is unclear. Can you be arrested for not surrendering your toothpaste? Doesn’t the 14th amendment of the Constitution protect us from government seizure of private property without due process? Details, details… Anyway, the whole thing probably really entails more “screening,” which to anyone who has had to endure it is actually worse than prison anyway – at least if I went to prison, there wouldn’t have been a chance that I was going to make my flight, whereas with the screening, they can delay it just long enough for you to miss final call for boarding and strand you somewhere.

So imagine my surprise today when I saw this story on the TSA in Denver. It seems that they actually took a cue from the successful crime fighter playbook and decided to start screening people who act suspicious.

This is an amazing breakthrough! Who would have thought that someone about to blow up a plane would be acting unusual?!

The program is named SPOT (Screening Passengers by Observation Technique). Since its inception, the program has led to 788 arrests, though none for terrorism. Nevertheless, 788 arrests is commendable, and the fact that we haven’t caught any terrorists doesn’t mean that we won’t.

Now for the idiocy. This program began in 2003 – that’s two years after 9/11 people. What the hell was going on before that? You know the answer – pay attention the next time you go through screening at the airport, or see the above discussion. That’s the TSA share of my annoyance for today.

But the real honor goes to the ACLU on this one, who:

opposes the program because it says it invades privacy and is similar to racial profiling.

Now, I’m a privacy fiend, and I tend to support the ACLU and their efforts to protect our rights, but explain to me exactly how someone observing your public actions in an public airport invades your privacy? That is exactly the opposite of privacy, and the problem with trying to claim it as such is that it blurs the lines between what is and is not private. Once the lines blur, it becomes much easier for the government to truly invade your privacy.

I also think the ACLU is moronic to oppose this simply because it is “similar” to racial profiling.

“When you give any person the authority to just stop people because you don’t like the way they’re behaving or you don’t like the way they look, essentially, I think you get profiling,” said Cathryn Hazouri with the ACLU

Note to ACLU – this IS profiling, this ISN’T RACIAL PROFILING.

Whether you like it or not, law enforcement doesn’t involve looking at numbers in a spreadsheet, or quality checking manufactured items without feelings. The entire essence of law enforcement is human interaction.

Criminals, no matter what their color, tend to share some common traits – they commit crimes, they act suspicious, they have certain motives, they are most likely to have certain backgrounds. To say that law enforcement can’t profile is moronic – why don’t we just get rid of all preventive law enforcement in that case? If officers can no longer observe people and say “hmmm, that seems odd, maybe I should check that out,” then why don’t we just let them sleep at their desks until something happens and call them. We could save a hell of a lot of money that way.

I’ll tell you the reason we don’t – because every single one of us knows that profiling works because every single one of us does it.

How do you think you decide who you will be friends with at work? How do you decide who you might hit it off with in a bar? How do you decide whom you should avoid when you walk down a city street? How do you decide who you will enter into business transactions with?

Answer – ding ding ding – PROFILING!

I’m not going to argue that racial profiling is good, because it isn’t. But to turn profiling into a bad word is foolish and stupid. Without profiling, the world as you know it would cease to exist – and it wouldn’t turn into a world of dolphins, rainbows, peace and brotherly love. It would turn into a world where you got victimized on a daily basis. Don’t believe me – try to stop doing it and see how well you fare.